The Kati Patang: October 2013

After several nights of giving up on blogging, tonight is finally the night when I've decided to post something up here.
Leaving something you love is never easy; especially when it is related to your dreams.
During the past one year, I've personally gone through a lot of changes in my life and the way I look towards it.
Earlier, when I used to have an hour to spend doing nothing, I had this special place where I could go and just play with the street dogs around. I felt alive; I felt independent. Things weren't easy even then. But whenever I had a tough time, I just walked and walked, all alone and confident. Never did I think I would have to do things with someone else. Do things with a team full of people like me.
Giving people orders is so not my cup of tea. I can only criticize them informally, or do the way I'm told to talk to them. But it all changed in one year. Just one year of nothingness.
It started as the beginning year of my bachelorhood. I finally gave up on science to choose the things I love. To honour my love for writing. My thoughts on becoming a journalist were pretty clear, yet my journey wasn't a planned one. There were days when I was thoroughly distracted. Not just from my aims, but from my maturity too. Sooner those things began to eat my time. I barely found time to look at myself in the mirror. My visits to the street dogs were reduced. The one thing that I dreaded was now happening to me. I was changing!
The thought of having a different me was so unbearable and complicated, I spent sleepless nights thinking what I would be in a year's time. I got no time to come online. My twitter personality was totally drifted away. My individuality had long gone. And there was no turning back. It feels bad, trust me.
It's actually been more than a year to those feelings, although it took me quite a reasonable amount of time to flip back to normal. And here I am, typing the way I used to, feeling the breeze of the midnight. How much has this moment been missed! How many have the stars been un-kissed?

This night.

Paplu!